How long to wait to text her back
There's no magic number. Reply when you naturally can, roughly match her pace, and stop watching the clock — strategic waiting is obvious and it kills momentum.
Why the waiting rules fail
Calculated delays feel calculated. And while you wait to look busy, the conversation cools down and someone else keeps it warm.
Match her pace, loosely
If she replies in minutes, you don't need to wait hours. If she replies once a day, you don't need to be on call. Mirror her roughly — not to the second.
Have a life
The best way not to look desperate is not to be glued to your phone. Answer when you're free. Sometimes that's right away, sometimes it's after the gym — both are fine.
When speed matters
Early in the chat and while you're setting up a date, quick replies keep the momentum. Once the date is set, texting can slow down — the real conversation happens in person.